The pieces of me

Kintsugi is the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold — built on the idea that in embracing flaws and imperfections, you can create an even stronger, more beautiful piece of art.

We break up just to make up, but the truth is I never knew I could love so deeply and be broken so completely.

At 14 he began to steal my innocence, but I didn’t understand. I learned to be invisible not to take his brand.

Manipulation was the name of the game, but it was never myself that was to blame.

Insidiously he took from me every bit of trust, but it wasn’t my fault it was his lust.

My insides eroded as I seethed with anger and rage, but still I was trapped within my cage.

I chased love like a marathon runner who lost, but I kept up the pace no matter the cost.

It was at my own expense and deprivation that drove me straight to you, but I was convinced from the start I could see right through.

Dance with me was my wish, pull me close, never let me go to grieve, but you wouldn’t give instead you chose to leave.

Our agreement established by the one called master became null and void with the final slap, but had it not, forever I would’ve been snared in your most dangerous trap.

See your marks, how they still remain, the ones you said I deserve and had to earn, but once I thought, when will a good girl such as me ever learn?

You chose this with all your reality and truth revealed, but how would you expect me to keep it all concealed?

Manipulation, coercion, control and trickery used  for destruction to tear me down, but you yourself put on my special, sparkling queen’s crown.

Every night my body poured into yours, but I was merely just one of your whores.

She must be fucked in the head, but it doesn’t matter since now she is long but dead

✍🏼🧝🏻‍♀️

This 12×12 space

Empty space filled with love 💗

Is where I feel safe I can hide from it all

Nothing can touch my heart I won’t fall

My life is flashing quickly before my eyes

It’s taken this long for me to become wise

Regrets I work hard not to have or to hold

Lessons I choose to admire as I grow old

Thank you for sharing your secrets in my ear

I’ve been holding my fondest memories very near

I always thought I could make my heart feel better

All it’s ever truly been is a broken delicate fracture

The pain I’ve worn has shown me what I need

At times it cries out as blood trickles and I bleed

When did all this time escape and pass me right by

Why do I continue to waste it and be made to cry

Because he left when I was merely a baby girl

Then again when she died leaving me in a whirl

The door has been open wide

Waiting for you to come on inside

Those who have walked through broke me more

No one else can have me as I begin to explore

Life is becoming what I make it up to be

The best thing I know is that I’m finally feeling free

✍🏼🧖🏼‍♀️