The Whole Cookie…

I’ve suffered for you beautifully and yet, I don’t know how to be your friend any longer. When I’ve stepped into the roles of friend, companion, lover, partner, even acquaintance, I’m not me, but rather a version of what you need and now I have to be stronger.

A box has been created that can no longer contain this mind, body and soul. I don’t feel right in my skin, but you try and pull me back in, stunting my growth with the smoke you exhale as I push harder against you, the more I derail.

He wasn’t the first, she won’t be the last, those pushing to conform me from deep in my past. I’ve lived my whole life afraid of what won’t be if I become who I am, the most authentic me. She looks at me with sadness in her eyes as he pushes hard for what he sees inside.

Don’t pity me for who I am, where I’ve been and how I got here. I have a story to tell from this life I’ve been living. I’m proud of my strength and the courage I’ve been given.

At times I disappear, overwhelmed by what I feel in my heart. So much focus is put on what I don’t bring instead of what I do and that is what keeps us so far apart.

The vampire was the one who depleted me from every emotion that was found. Reciprocation wasn’t in the game and that defeated me beneath the ground

Time spent together for so very many years dependent upon how much I would give. Stretched beyond my very own limits finding this was no way to live

Breaking free of those who no longer serve or hold that depth in my very soul
Releasing you all as I begin to let go, time for these wings to spread finally allowing me to grow.

No longer accepting your crumbs. I deserve, The Whole Cookie…

🧖🏼‍♀️✍🏻

Author: Tammy Kay

Somewhere along blurred lines, my self worth was solely dependent upon everyone else's opinions besides mine. Past life would keep dictating this way of “living” for a very long time. Like a brick pathway, my belief system was cemented in and it established a flawed premise of which I had learned to stick with and live by. I have since come to understand that a belief is just a thought I continue to have. So brick by brick, I’ve begun the demolition and reconstruction during this process of becoming the most authentic version of me. For a lifetime this far, I have accepted the unacceptable, tolerated the intolerable and have remained in places far beyond their expiration date. After all, I had to stay with all my broken pieces. Now, I have been stifled for far too long. Freedom has bestowed upon me the use of my voice at last. Won't you join me on a new roller coaster of life as I navigate my way through this next part of my journey? I promise to share my experience, strength and hope from my heart with depth and truth. I guarantee I will write about difficult things, struggles and even pain, yet in the darkness a little light glows. Through inspiration, a glimmer will shine because I want to leave you a little better than when you first found me.

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